Thursday, March 11, 2010

a look back...Journaling Part 4

April writing...

...I got a great idea in the shower the other day; I had been meaning to pull out some of my old journals and re-read them. I like doing that every so often. Although I didn't journal NEAR enough when I was younger! While I was reading, I thought it would be a neat idea to share some of the entries with you...Especially some of the ones that show how Husby and I started our relationship. I have changed some names for privacy purposes...if you know me...then you know who the boyfriend was and who Husby is...just to clear that up! On to Part 4...

I was eagerly anticipating getting engaged, of course I didn't know where or how...I just knew it was close or so I thought...

"February 4th, 2001,
Well I have had one heck of a day!
This past Thursday Husby talked once more to my Father about the engagement. Well, my Father stated to him that he wanted us to wait until Spring (April or May). Dad thought he made that clear when we all talked and that we agreed upon that at the conclusion of our talk, I guess I heard otherwise. So Husby had already planned the whole night that he was going to propose and now it wasn't going to happen.
Dad also told Husby that he did not want me to be torn between him and Husby, so mainly the decision on the time frame of our engagement would be up to me. No pressure Dad. In all honesty there was a HUGE amount of pressure. I mean, do I let down the man I love by telling him to wait to please my Father or do I let down my Father by not complying with his wishes, when technically he is the Man in my life for now, because I am not married yet.
I knew what I needed to do, partly I am sure Dad knew that I would because that is how I was raised. I decided to wait until the Spring. That way Husby and I will be happily engaged and Dad is happy cause we waited. It seemed like the only win-win situation in my head.
Even though Husby said "ok, no big deal." I knew he was a little let down. We had a really long conversation and during that conversation he told me of his plans to propose. He said he had decided to take Valentine's Day and rent a limo to take us to a nice dinner and he was going to propose at some point during that dinner.
Of course, being the ball of emotions that I was, I began balling...I didn't want this to ruin our engagement and I was so disappointed. Husby held me while I cried and he just let me get out all those emotions. Tomorrow night we plan on going out to talk. I wish this hadn't all been ruined, but I have to know that God has a plan! Those seem to be my only words to live by in times like these..."

And boy did God ever have a plan! We talked alot over the next few months about the future. We knew, one way or another we would be engaged, just when was the unknown factor. We even at one point during April of 2001, booked the church and reserved the wedding date for May 4th, 2002...but as things would go for us...even that date wouldn't be the right time for us...check back tomorrow for Part 5 and the conclusion of our dating story...

Part 3
Part 2
Part 1

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